Ashton's First T-Ball Game

Ashton has a great team for t-ball, all his best buddies are on it!  He's enjoyed it so far.  Here are some pics from his first game.

Ashton's Preschool Graduation

Ashton is a preschool graduate!  On to Kindergarten with him!  Hope he get's the same teacher Brielle had because we sure loved her.  

Ashton was so cute to watch.  He seems to really love to sing and did a really impressive job at their preschool graduation performance. The more Ashton has done Tavaci (the children's choir) and the more time he spends around his Foster side uncles- my brothers who sing and play the guitar and jam all the time, the more he seems to take a liking to music.   Anyway, the graduation was cute to boot.

Singing their songs.

Getting ready to hand out diplomas.

His teacher, Mrs. Hawkins.

Clapping as each name is read.

Good sign when your child reads his own preschool diploma :)

Congratulations, Ashton, buddy!!!  We love you!!!

Spring Fair

The end of the school year means time for the Spring Fair.  This is Brielle's music class' concert.

Brielle with her buddy, Ella.

After the concert, Brielle and I ate the famous BBQ chicken made on the spot at the fair.  It is TASTY!  Todd and the kids met up with us later for the parade.

Waiting on the curb for the parade to start.

Brielle walking with her class in the parade.

Collecting candy.

Our neighbor (and babysitter), Ashley.  She won Miss Western Idaho this year.

Our friend, Makayla, miss Outstanding Teen.

Our awesome State Senator, Monty Pearce with his family.  They are friends of ours.

Out to Kiwi Loco for frozen yogurt after being in the hot sun all day!

Mother's Day

Mother's Day was wonderful.  Todd and the kids pampered me all day.  My favorite, as usual, would be a massage from Todd.  To say I'm a back rub addict would be an understatement.  We spent the evening at Todd's mom's house visiting with her and everyone there.  I got a call in to my mom and enjoyed talking to her for a while.

Todd knows how to make me feel pretty when he says he thinks I look so good that he wants to take a picture of it.  The opportunity for Todd to ever say such a thing could usually only ever occur on a Sunday after church since I so often look like a hobo or a gym rat the rest of the week :)  But he said he wanted to get some pictures of me on Mother's Day and even made me pose by myself for some.  I'm usually ridiculously awkward in pictures by myself.  I just feel cheesy posing alone- without someone to put my arm around, I never know what to do with my hands!

On the other hand, Mother's Day pictures with the kids never turn out the way I hope.  The sun kills their eyes, someone won't look at the camera, someone starts to pinch or poke or cry.  I think next year we'll go for a silly face picture.  At least then I can't be disappointed :)  Watch- they'll all smile in unison like angels while I'm making a monkey face... These were the best we got of the kids and I after church.

I love my children so much.  I'm loving having Brielle home all day in the summer time.  She's so special.  Such a mature spirit with an innocent mind.  There is no end to her thoughtfulness.  Ashton is cracking us up daily.  His age and the quirks that come with boys are priceless.  He recently went on his first Father's and Sons camp out and I loved hearing about it from him.  He's so adventure-oriented and full of life.  Lainey Doll is... a doll.  When she's not throwing a tantrum.  She's still my loviest doviest-most willing to snuggle.  And so stinking cute on her good days. :)  I love knowing from experience now that they do grow out of the "terribles".

Here are the the cheesy ones.

I'm the kind of person who, if I'm passionate about something, always has a goal in it, and stays very committed to that goal.  It's a good quality in some ways, but I'm learning I need to stop and enjoy each success before I move on to what's next.  Otherwise, it's sort of a gratitude-killing cycle.  At first it was weight loss goals, then race-time goals, followed by a long time of strength and weight lifting goals.

This miscarriage set me so much farther back than I ever thought possible.  And I'm still recovering in terms of energy, inflammation, and ligament/join pain.  So far, the low point: my squat max ended up losing a total of 85 pounds, almost half!  My hip joint would just give out if I tried to lift anything remotely heavy.  And I'm still not sure what I've lost in my deadlift because I'm too scared to lift that lift at maximum output with my body feeling this way.

Everything about me feels different.  I don't like it. I feel swollen, tight/tense, tired, often on the verge of injury. So everything I do in the gym tapered way back for a couple of months as I tried to cut myself some slack and let my body heal.  I notice the affects of it, but the sweet things my husband says and does keeps my spirits up for the most part.  It's a temporary lull, just longer than I anticipated.  To clarify, I don't mean that I think I look bad, I just tend to be "curve-challenged" and I miss that small boost in curves that heavy weight lifting gives women.  But the real complaint has little to do with how I look and a lot more to do with how I FEEL and the discomforts that are finally subsiding.

Anyway, I guess I had complained about it enough to Todd around Mothers Day, that he thought he'd snap a few pictures of me, make me feel like a queen all day, help me relax and smile, and make me "snap" out of my self pity while he was at it.  I just had NO IDEA that miscarriages affected how the body feels and responds this much for this long.  But it doesn't seem to be uncommon from what I'm hearing from friends.  Paige, you were NOT kidding when you said I would feel like a human science experiment! 

Probably no one wants to hear me whine about my achy body or my set backs.  And as of maybe a week ago, I'm finding that how I feel is finally starting to improve rather than digress.  Sorry to bore anyone.  Being my journal, I just want to document anything significant that happens to me and the fam.  My doctor has been monitoring my pregnancy hormone levels every so often to watch them drop back down.  She did say it most commonly goes back to normal in two weeks but for some it takes longer and I'm at about ten weeks right now.  But, I'm close to normal levels.  Hopefully once those levels normalize, I'll bounce back a little more quickly.

Miscarriage is hard.  But when things work out and we get the little ones we hoped for... those children are worth every ounce of sacrifice and discomfort.  I'm grateful for the three wonderful children who call me Mother.

I'm grateful for my loving companion.  He inspires me to be a better mother by what an incredible father he is.

I'm grateful for my mother.  There are so many memory clips that play in the back of my mind throughout each day- of her lovingly coaching me through life.  It's the realization of the impact she really had on me that keeps me vigilant with my children because I know what a power for good a mother can be through her wonderful example.  I love her.  I wish I could have snapped a current picture of her on Mother's Day.  Or spent part of the day with her.  I miss her all the time.